Mindful Mondays|Week 11: Kindness, Find Us

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If you have been practicing mindfulness for a while, you are familiar with loving-kindness meditations. If you struggle with those, you aren’t alone. And, also, don’t worry, because today we aren’t going to do one of those. I’m not going to ask you to be kind or say kind things to anyone or yourself. Let’s get started.

Take a really comfortable seat, maybe even lying down today. Pick a spot that, if you can, is in a different location from where you usually meditate. Try to change the vibe a little bit.

Keep your eyes open for this part. Let’s start by taking three deep breaths with some head/neck rolls. It will look like this — start with your chin to your chest. Take one inhale and exhale to open the spine. On your next inhale, roll your head slowly to the right, all the way back so you are looking at the ceiling or sky, and follow through all the way back down to the chin to position. As you exhale, roll completely the opposite way, ending with your chin back down toward chest. Let’s try three complete inhale and exhale rolls in this way.

***

Now let’s settle into the ground and close your eyes if that feels safe. Place a hand over your chest, around the area of your sternum. Place your palm down so that you can feel your heartbeat. Let’s take a minute to focus on just that heartbeat inside our chest. Feel its rhythm; get familiar with its pulse; trust its steadiness.

***

Today, I want you to imagine that ever-steady heartbeat as your personal kindness. I believe each of us has a part inside that is called our Self-Kindness part. No matter how distracted we are, it’s still in there, buried in your chest, pumping along. Maybe moments you are not active with self-care, it gets a bit sluggish. When you are exercising your Kindness part, it is pumping strong and loudly. When you sit quietly, you can feel it, and even better you can feel it with your hand as a tool. Sometimes it takes a bit of silence, yet still sometimes it will palpitate when it needs attention. I think it’s really important to recognize you have a Self-Kindness part. Instead of a typical loving-kindness mantra, let’s change the prayer today to: Kindness, find us. We can speak to this Kindness part and ask it to join us in this meditation. We want the self-kindness, but there’s no rush or push to force it. Sometimes you do need to fake it til you make it, but today I’d like us to try the gentle back door. Let’s tell our Kindness part that we know it’s there. We see it; we want and need it. Ware open to it visiting us and gracing us with its presence. Give is a try with me:

Kindness, find us.

Kindness, find us.

Kindness, find us.

Kindness, we know you live inside us and are ever-available to us. Teach us to call on you more, especially in our times of self-criticism. Remind us with small palpitations, minor nudgings, that you are ever-ready to greet us and ground us in love and self-compassion.

Kindness, find us.

Kindness, find us.

Kindness, find us.

Let’s come back to the space around us, sounds, and our body. Take a moment to be thankful for your Self-Kindness part. With one last deep breath, you can open your eyes. Let Kindness find you throughout your day. Until next time, be well.